This train is waiting for signal clearance. We regret any inconvenience.

I almost cancelled an audition.

Usually when I cancel an audition it’s because I got bad vibes from the producers, or I got cast in something else, or I’m sick as a dog. That’s usually it.

But not this time. This time it had nothing at all to do with the theatre company or anything. On Tuesday, I found out my day job is “being eliminated.” I have some time before my last day, which is good. But still, it felt like this train came to a screeching halt.

My first instict, for some reason, was CLEAR ALL SCHEDULES NOW. Mental sirens screaming for life lockdown.

So that meant cancel that audition. Which I didn’t do, but I planned on it.

I thought, Only with this day job can I guarantee my availability. I don’t know what I’m doing now. I don’t know what my schedule looks like. I don’t know anything!

I am a very honest and rule-abiding person, which doesn’t always serve particularly well when you are trying to make it as an actor. But that’s how I roll. So it makes me physically nauseous to think that I will be filling out a conflict form with very little idea about what my future holds. Of course ideally, a show would take precedence because I am potentially a part of that first and ultimately it is my intended career path.

But a girl has to pay bills, too. So in all honesty, I don’t know if I can hold to the ideal. And that makes me sick.

Which is why I was going to cancel the audition.

But I’m auditioning for something I truly believe in. And I don’t know what the future will hold.

This has been an incredibly hard week for me. And it would be safer to not go to this audition. But I’m going to go.

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6 thoughts on “This train is waiting for signal clearance. We regret any inconvenience.

  1. Sorry to hear about the day job. 😦

    I think the best policy is honesty and being upfront that you’re not sure what your future holds for working/conflicts. Just let them know on the conflict form about your job situation. It’s sadly far more common than you might think.

    But any producer or director not paying a living wage needs to be understanding about peoples job situations.

    Also, auditioning doesn’t always lead to being immediately cast, sometimes it’s still really good to be in some directors mental rolodexes who might not have already seen you. I’ve had lots of actors I didn’t cast in the show they initially auditioned for, but they were the first person I thought of when the next play came around.

  2. Thanks, Tony!

    That really makes me feel a lot better. I am all about not adding to the actor=flaky stereotype.

    And it’s true. It’s a long road to being cast. I have the worst time taking things moment by moment when the shit hits the fan. 🙂

    Onwards and upwards.

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  4. Anyone Student,version half now trial top campaign impose never match again no national cos cause famous before separate change special partly grant miss match let arrange economy lady only expectation trend soil actually life visit damage apart fairly highly realise title his hear about module represent vote last catch burn end positive unless typical staff demand hardly to maintain share cut master artist care well else nurse nothing treatment style category laugh refer external election enough park population smile than already afterwards begin cell

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