2009 – You crafty, clever bitch

I’m not a big “Year in Review” person. Mainly, this is because I rarely read or see or listen to things the year they come out. If Jamie hadn’t forced Midwinter Graces upon me (and thank god she did) I wouldn’t have gotten around to it until I was 37.

Having lost my job this year, I’m feeling a little…well…weird. As someone who prides herself on intuition, I’m flummoxed I didn’t see this one coming. I mean, I did, but it was about an hour before the meeting in the conference room.

So what I’d like to do here is boost myself up a little as I head into my final week of being a receptionist at my present job. So this is a Year in Review, but it’s not a list of pop culture items I really liked.


1. Politically, I know what I’m talking about. The Bush economic and foreign policies failed just as spectacularly as I thought they would back in 2001. Now, this means a lot to me for a couple reasons. First, I’m a political nerd. And I have a sense of how a feminist or feminine approach to economics and foreign policy is highly beneficial. Bush basically did the opposite. And it failed. Second, I have recently, lost a bit of my sense of “how the world works.” This makes me feel like I still am able to think at a very critical level. No, I’m not right all the time, but I am smart. I need to remind myself of that. As such, I want to encourage everyone to back the f*ck up about Obama and his first year. He is accomplishing incredible amounts of things as we speak. Is he going to fly a “Mission Accomplished” sign? No he’s not. Have patience, sisters and brothers. It takes more than a day to make a plum pudding.

2. I am really a very strong person. I used to equate the fact that I will sob immediately and seemingly with no cause at any given moment, along with the fact that I can be crippled by anxiety and OCD with being a “weak” person. I’m not. I’m really strong. I mean, how could I carry around this much baggage if I’m weak? Right? That was a joke.

3. I only accomplished 2 of my 10 Resolutions. And one of them was “have a fully stocked bar”, but how keyed in was that, I ask you?

4. Fear IS the opposite of love.

5. When shit hits the fan, I take refuge in family and personal tradition.

6. That I am spectacularly blessed by the people in my life, and that even when I’m not being particularly charming, or even nice…people like me. I don’t get it. But it’s true.

7. I think the phrase “being born again” means reincarnation, not the other thing.

8. That my time is incredibly valuable, even if I spend it doing nothing at all. And that google calendar may, outside antibiotics and inhalers, be the best invention ever.

9. Madeline Albright is quickly becoming a hero to me.

10. We all contain multitudes. Contradictions. And we should all be allowed to own all of them. Certainly, I’m not encouraging hypocrisy. I’m just saying you can like your cake, and hate it too.

So 2009 was tough.

But I felt my brain growing more wrinkly and complex. I was also pickling it in my fully stocked bar. (The other resolution was to have a craft space. I did that too. The SODA room.)

I quite literally have no idea what 2010 has in store. There are a couple events in the calendar. Celebrations, actually. Not a bad way to get things started.


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